Pixels (2015)

Pixels (2015)

Director: Chris Columbus

Cast: Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Michelle Monaghan, Peter Dinklage, Josh Gad, Brian Cox, Sean Bean, Dan Aykroyd

Currently, it feels as if people are programmed to hate any Adam Sandler film released, even without having seen it. They’re prerogative is that Adam Sandler no longer makes “good movies”. Nowadays, you can’t read a review for an Adam Sandler film without it centering around how much Sandler sucks now and how he hasn’t made a good movie in eons and blah, blah, blah. I’m not into hating for hates sake, which is what is apparently happening with Sandler, it’s this hive like mentality of hatred towards Sandler. Where does the hatred stem from? Probably from the string of bad movies he’s been making. The last torturous one I saw was Jack and Jill (2011) and that one turned me off from seeing Sandler movies. How did I end up seeing that one in theaters you might ask? Well, I like to give movies the benefit of the doubt, sometimes I come out a winner and discover a film I would have not seen otherwise, but other times, like with Jack and Jill it’s just like“WHYYYYY?!” The way I see it and in Sandler’s defense I will say that we can’t really blame Sandler for making bland family movies, because that’s who he is, he’s the all encompassing actor who makes films that are supposed to appeal to everyone. He’s movies are made to be consumed in mass quantities and in order to do that, the film has to be a certain way. They can’t be too intense, or bloody, or offensive or violent, they gotta have that ‘feel good, nothing bad is going to happen’ vibe to them. Like, don’t take nothing to seriously, you’re here just to have some fun. Let’s just accept that he’s the guy who makes that type of film, that’s who he’s become. He’s gone the way of Eddie Murphy, but in a successful way? My advice is, if you don’t like the crappy pappy movies that Sandler makes, don’t go and see them! Just wait until he works with a good director, gets critical acclaim again and makes something like Punch Drunk Love (2002), his only truly good film if you ask me.

So just how squeaky clean is Pixels? Well, just by way of an example, in one scene when Sandler sees Pac-Man eat the hand of his creator, and Sandler he says “that was some weird….stuff” instead of “That was some weird…shit!” He even pauses before saying ‘stuff’ as if mentally correcting himself saying “nope, gotta keep it PG-13!” But whatever man, you can say “shit” in a PG-13 movie, it’s just that you’re so self censored that you can’t even bring yourself to say shit. The most basic of cusses. It feels as if Sandler is in a censored state of mind even as he films, in other words, no real space to cut loose and go crazy. Feels like there’s no improv and if you have a good comedian on your film, usually that’s where comedy gold is at, the improv. But no, dialog here is clean as a whistle, god forbid word of mouth spreads and a mother ends up saying something like “my kid is not going to see that nasty Adam Sandler movie, he’s always cussing”. So following Sandler’s squeaky clean movie rules, the film will have kids and families, often times dysfunctional families facing problems and overcoming them (like a divorce for example) and Sandler will be sympathetic and kind to the kid in the movie because that’s the target audience. So this is the kind of movie you can expect my friends. A film following a formula every step of the way. Nothing is to be taken too seriously; you can’t invest yourself emotionally because you know nobody will die. Not in a squeaky clean Adam Sandler family movie like this one, so just sit back and watch the fireworks, which is really the only thing that this movie is good for.

Some folks seem to think that this film was based on an episode of Futurama that has a similar premise, but in reality, this film is based on a French short film that lasts only about 2 ½ minutes, it is also called Pixels (which you can see here) and it sets the ground rules for the look and the mechanics of the’ video games come to life’ part of the film. The short makes no sense or meaning, it just shows us a guy putting an old television in the garbage and suddenly from said television all these old video games emerge. Suddenly Donkey Kong is on top of the Empire State building throwing barrels, Pac Man is eating street cars and Centipedes fly through the skies. In the short, the video game characters destroy the city by turning everything they touch into square little pixels, but that’s about as far as the thing goes. It has no story, no villains, no heroes, just a concept which Chris Columbus and Adam Sandler ran with and stretched into a film. And I say stretched because that’s what they did, the films premise is so simple, the story so non-existent, the characters so one note that they had to stretch things out. Pixels feels  repetitive and one note; we fight one video game, beat it, then fight the next one, and they go on and on like this till the end. There’s nothing unexpected here, this is as formulaic as it gets. Worst part? This is the kind of movie in which the trailer has shown you everything. If you’ve seen the trailer, then you know, step by step how this movie is going to go.

What this movie is though is a nostalgia bomb. If you were born in the 80’s and played video games in arcades the way I did, you will feel a shot of nostalgia in your system. I have to admit it was cool seeing a giant Pac-Man eating up taxi cabs and city streets, especially since I’m such a Pac-Man nut! It was awesome seeing a giant King Kong throwing barrels at Adam Sandler, and then there’s this scene where they simply throw as many old video game characters on the screen as they can, so you’ll see Frogger, Q-bert, Paperboy, Centipede, Galaga, Space Invaders…and that’s without counting all the other characters from 80’s pop culture that show up in the film like Max Headroom, Ronald Reagan, Madonna and Hall & Oates. The soundtrack is made up of hits from the 80’s all the way. So in this sense, the movie proves entertaining to an extent, you will be like “Oh there’s Q-Bert!” Still, I think they could have used even more classic video game characters on the film, apparently they could only afford to use a limited amount of characters. Where was the knight from Ghosts and Goblins? Sadly, the novelty of seeing old video game characters on screen is the only thing this film has to offer, the movie itself is just a bunch of empty calories starting by the fact that the villains in this movie are faceless, we never really know who they are because they talk through videogame characters. So suddenly, our favorite old school video games are evil. I mean, I never saw Pac-Man as a bad guy? But there he is eating people up! So yeah, this is yet another film with a weak villain whom we never even get to meet. Pixels is extremely simple and banal that’s all I can say.

Chris Columbus directs this film and it's sad to see him directing such a simplistic film, considering he's actually done decent family films like Home Alone and Home Alone 2, hell this is the guy who wrote Gremlins (1984) and freaking The Goonies (1985)! I would have liked something from Columbus with a little more story put into it, instead the whole film runs on a gag, not really even trying to get us invested. Pixel does have its moments, again, mostly its moments are associated with the appearance of the giant video game characters, but where’s the comedy? It’s not here; Pixels feels like they are not even really trying. I mean, you got all these good actors and comedians in your movie, why not have them throw in some of their own personality, let them improvise, let them put a little of their soul into the proceedings. This is the reason why Ghostbusters (1984) worked so well, it had a lot of Bill Murray and Dan Aykroyd in it, it’s their personalities that bring those characters to life. In contrast, on Pixels Sandler seems to have no personality, he’s got this spaced out, bored look on his face all the time? Like he doesn’t even want to speak? He’s so laid back that he comes of as lifeless. So yeah, I get why people hate on Sandler so much, he’s just not doing anything relevant lately, I hope he gets his mojo back at some point. Still, Pixels isn’t terrible, it’s completely watchable, just not very engaging or hilarious. It’s simply put a very average film. But hey, there’s Frogger jumping and smashing a car into pieces! Cool!

Rating: 2 out of 5 

The Campaign (2012)

Title: The Campaign (2012)

Director: Jay Roach

Cast: Will Farrell, Zack Galifianakis, Dan Aykroyd, John Lithgow, Dylan McDermott, Brian Cox

Are you a Republican or a Democrat? Do you believe in a form of government that works for its people? Do you hate the savage way in which political parties throw dirt at each other all over the media? These are the questions you gotta keep in mind when watching The Campaign. I live on the island of Puerto Rico, and boy, political parties here tear each other apart in the media, election time in my country is not not that different from what we portrayed in this new Will Ferrell/Zack Galifianakis/Jay Roach comedy ‘The Campaign’. This film is a sincere and savage satire at the way the political game is played and how dirty it can get. It’s the kind of film that politicians don’t want you to watch because it exposes them for what they truly are: showmen looking to sell you an empty spectacle.

   

Ferrell plays the well oiled politician known as Cam Brady. He’s obviously The Republican candidate who’s the ‘All American Man’ he goes to church, he believes in his country and in supporting this nations troops, he’s a family man with a beautiful wife, and two kids! He also has a mistress on the side, and one night, when he decides to call her up and get kinky with her, he mistakenly ends up calling a Christian’s family’s home and leaves them a particularly nasty sexually charged message on their answering machine. This embarrassing turn of events causes a new candidate to move forward in the political race, his name is ‘Marty Huggins’ played by Zack Galifianakis. Huggins is a leader of the people, a person truly interested in doing something for his town. He tells the people to bring their brooms with him to Washington because, “It’s a mess!” Who will win this battle; the evil , selfish politician or the one who cares for the interests of the people? 

In my opinion, all the greatest comedies succeed because of the cast. Special effects movies, action movies, they can get away with having mediocre actors because there’s the action, and there are the effects to keep you interested. But in a comedy you can’t risk having bad actors. You have to get truly funny people in there or your reason for being is dead. In order to make your audience laugh, you need good comedians. Ghostbusters (1984), The Blues Brothers (1980), Coming to America (1988), Young Frankenstein (1974), all these super comedies worked because the cast is freaking amazing. Of course, great comedy directors where behind them as well, and it’s the combination of these two elements that make a great comedy. I think this was the case with The Campaign, a film made by some truly funny people and a trusted comedy director: Jay Roach.  

Director Jay Roach 

Ferrell, when he’s good he’s good and on this film he is truly on. I mean the guy is dead funny. I always enjoyed Will Ferrell’s take on president George W. Bush, he was so dead on with his Saturday Night Live sketches; it was always truly funny stuff in my book. The Campaign takes all those satirical sketches that Ferrell did on Saturday Night Live and takes them up to a hundred. Zack Galifianakis, I'm so glad he is on this one playing off of Will Ferrell's character, they are perfect for each other because they are both comedians that are very extreme, they'll go the lengths necessary to make us laugh, so this two explosively funny comedians on the screen is a match made in heaven as far as I'm concerned, I hope this film serves to push Galifianakis's career even further. There’s no mercy for politicians on this movie! I loved that about it, because come one, let’s face it, these political campaigns can get vicious and it’s that viciousness that works like magic on this movie. As it is in the real world, these guys really have no mercy for each other. And for those of you who think this film is only for liberals, well, I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong because both parties are made fun off, but its primordially the rich republicans who get the heat. In this films eyes, Big Money and the politicians who play their evil game are the true villain. In The Campaign big business only cares about financially backing up a politician that they can easily manipulate. Sadly, same as in the real world, there are always politicians more then willing to play along.  These millionaires with huge businesses are the ones who could turn this world around because they have the money to do it, but instead they choose child slavery as an option. They choose to buy the elections, play dirty, keep slavery going in the world, only now they call it ‘less than minimum wage’. So these are the guys that The Campaign aims its guns at, which is actually perfectly alright by me. I think the film has every right to say that Washington is “a mess!”

Jay Roach is a director who has made many a fine comedy, in my book all three of the Austin Powers movies rocked; these are the kinds of comedies I like to watch over and over again. Meet the Parents (2000) and Meet the Fockers (2004), both hilarious in my book. It’s safe to say that Jay Roach has turned into one of those great comedy directors; it seems like Roach will be a mainstay in Hollywood; his comedies are hugely successful most of the time. Ultimately, what I loved most about the film is how it comments on the fakeness of politics, on how it manipulates the masses to think a certain way. The political game portrayed on this film and the one we see in real life are both one big circus attraction, one big show that tries to attract as many zombies as it can with its bright colorful lights, loud music and it’s confetti. They are simply trying to sell you a product that you will ultimately be disappointed by. Wouldn’t it be great if for once they would try to sell us a politician that wouldn’t disappoint?  One that would be worth a damn? The Campaign is well worth the watch, funny every step of the way and unafraid to sshow things the way they are, it gets a couple of extra points simply for that in my book!

Rating: 4 out of 5